Online Personal Ads - Talking to the Opposite Sex

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by: JayReiss,M.S.W.
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I'm an Online Dating Coach, and many of the ads I see on the Internet are shocking! There are some (often written by guys looking for women) who write their ads like they're trying to sell used furniture in the classified section of their daily papers! The women's ads are often just as bad - often containing very little substantial information - or the ads just come across as demanding.

Here's one example. This ad was submitted by a woman in her early 40's -

professional who enjoys open conversation - 41

"I love to talk about books that have struck you bizarre or interesting. I do want someone to hang out with, and must enjoy talking about politics, books, places and wine. Must love chocolate!"

Communication is apparently high up on this woman's priority list (how nice!) Whether "talking about everything" is also nice would depend, I suppose, on what "everything" might include. It's hard to say what she's referring to when she talks about "bizarre" books, although Stephen King novels come to mind for me. I'm not sure how many guys love chocolate, but for the sake of maintaining positive relationships, I imagine a lot of guys would go along with that one - assuming, of course, that "bizarre" books don't stand in the way first!

It would be interesting to see which types of guys reply to this ad!

Have a look at this next online dating ad - it's from a young man who describes himself as the "Tattoo Teddy Bear" -

tattoo teddy bear - 29

"i just want a good girl that knows how to treat a man with respect."

Now that was an example of an Internet dating ad that doesn't mince words!

After reading ads like this, I can really understand why so many men and women are communicating at cross-purposes!

Which brings me to our first lesson of today: Always write your Online Dating ads like you're having a normal conversation with someone!

In other words, here is a list of what to avoid:

1. Don't write your ad so it sounds like advertising copy from a magazine.

2. Don't "talk down" to your readers.

3. Don't write a one-sentence ad and expect to get many replies!

Follow these guidelines instead:

1. Mention some of your hobbies, interests, and what you enjoy doing on a date. Try to paint an accurate yet imaginative picture of yourself as a real person (and an interesting person at that!)

2. Using colorful, imaginative language, and paint a picture of how she or he will feel when you're together on a date. Use examples, anticipate questions, and be upbeat and optimistic. Give your reader a sense of what being with you is like - and describe that in some detail when writing your dating ad.

3. Mention some of your best inner qualities to motivate your readers to respond to your ad!

4. What are some of the reasons (i.e., the benefits) for answering your ad today? What will she or he gain by doing so?

5. Don't forget to spell-check your ad before you submit it!

By creating an honest and empathic dialog with your reader when writing your online personal ads, you'll be way ahead of most of your competitors for the attention of the women - or men - you'd like to hear from the most!

About the Author

Would you like to meet beautiful women online today? Or sexy men? Take advantage of this amazing Offer: Get three FREE online personal ads and a FREE Online Dating Profile! Go to my Online Dating site today at http://www.online-dating-coach.com

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<h1>Online Personal Ads - Talking to the Opposite Sex</h1> <p> I'm an Online Dating Coach, and many of the ads I see on the Internet are shocking! There are some (often written by guys looking for women) who write their ads like they're trying to sell used furniture in the classified section of their daily papers! The women's ads are often just as bad - often containing very little substantial information - or the ads just come across as demanding.<br /><br />Here's one example. This ad was submitted by a woman in her early 40's -<br /><br />professional who enjoys open conversation - 41<br /><br />"I love to talk about books that have struck you bizarre or interesting. I do want someone to hang out with, and must enjoy talking about politics, books, places and wine. Must love chocolate!"<br /><br />Communication is apparently high up on this woman's priority list (how nice!) Whether "talking about everything" is also nice would depend, I suppose, on what "everything" might include. It's hard to say what she's referring to when she talks about "bizarre" books, although Stephen King novels come to mind for me. I'm not sure how many guys love chocolate, but for the sake of maintaining positive relationships, I imagine a lot of guys would go along with that one - assuming, of course, that "bizarre" books don't stand in the way first!<br /><br />It would be interesting to see which types of guys reply to this ad!<br /><br />Have a look at this next online dating ad - it's from a young man who describes himself as the "Tattoo Teddy Bear" -<br /><br />tattoo teddy bear - 29<br /><br />"i just want a good girl that knows how to treat a man with respect."<br /><br />Now that was an example of an Internet dating ad that doesn't mince words!<br /><br />After reading ads like this, I can really understand why so many men and women are communicating at cross-purposes!<br /><br />Which brings me to our first lesson of today: Always write your Online Dating ads like you're having a normal conversation with someone!<br /><br />In other words, here is a list of what to avoid:<br /><br />1. Don't write your ad so it sounds like advertising copy from a magazine.<br /><br />2. Don't "talk down" to your readers.<br /><br />3. Don't write a one-sentence ad and expect to get many replies!<br /><br />Follow these guidelines instead:<br /><br />1. Mention some of your hobbies, interests, and what you enjoy doing on a date. Try to paint an accurate yet imaginative picture of yourself as a real person (and an interesting person at that!)<br /><br />2. Using colorful, imaginative language, and paint a picture of how she or he will feel when you're together on a date. Use examples, anticipate questions, and be upbeat and optimistic. Give your reader a sense of what being with you is like - and describe that in some detail when writing your dating ad.<br /><br />3. Mention some of your best inner qualities to motivate your readers to respond to your ad!<br /><br />4. What are some of the reasons (i.e., the benefits) for answering your ad today? What will she or he gain by doing so?<br /><br />5. Don't forget to spell-check your ad before you submit it!<br /><br />By creating an honest and empathic dialog with your reader when writing your online personal ads, you'll be way ahead of most of your competitors for the attention of the women - or men - you'd like to hear from the most! <h2>About the Author</h2> Would you like to <a href="http://www.online-dating-coach.com">meet beautiful women online</a> today? Or sexy men? Take advantage of this amazing Offer: Get three <a href="http://www.online-dating-coach.com">FREE online personal ads</a> and a FREE Online Dating Profile! Go to my Online Dating site today at http://www.online-dating-coach.com </p>

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