10 Ways to Make Your Illness Support Group Uplifting
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by: LisaCopen
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You felt awful the entire day but you decided to get in the car and go to the support group anyway. You thought it would be good for you. It took forever to find the building at the hospital and then you ended up parking what seemed like a mile from the suite number. You found a chair that smelled like old sweat and smoke and hoped somehow you would find some encouragement. But an hour later you're ready to make dash for the door. Everyone seems to be so depressed! And too many people want to either sell you a juicer that is sure to cure your problems, or tell you about every surgery they've had since 1977.
Aren't support groups supposed to be valuable in learning how to cope with illness and encourage one another?
The answer is yes! Studies completed by Dr. David Spiegel have concluded that support groups do in fact improve the quality of life of those who are willing to attend. Recent studies (CANCER, Sept 2007) have show that support groups do not actually increase the lifespan of one who lives with cancer. But regardless, by having one's feelings about her illness validated, her skills of coping with chronic illness are definitely more improved.
You may attend a support group, or perhaps even lead one, but regardless of how long you have (or have not) participated in one, it's likely that you've seen the slippery slope of how quickly people can go from sharing honest, vulnerable feelings to a session of complaints and even quarreling. Looking for fresh and fun icebreaker games for small groups to perk things up?
Whether you lead a support group or just participate, chances are you've noticed how slippery the slope is when people start talking about their illness. These ideas will work for any groups, from an Aspergers support group in Dallas to a bipolar support group in Birmingham. Alabama. And they are excellent to have when you are creating a proposal for starting up a support group. Here are 10 ways to make your illness support group get some giggles back between the trials.
1. Make faces on sticks. It may sound silly, but sometimes getting back to basics works best. Cut out smiley faces and sad faces and glue them on each side of a stick or plastic knife. As people take turns sharing about their week, make sure they can show both sides of the faces. For example, Kim may hold up the sad face while she says "getting ready for surgery and all the therapy afterwards has been stressful." (Then she can flip the face over to a smiley face) "But I've really appreciated how many family members has volunteered to help with childcare."
2. 2. Rethink your definition of what counts as indoor games for small groups. For example, ask everyone to bring an item to contribute to a JOY box and then pass it around during the meeting and let people choose everything to take home. The range of objects can be anything a silicone bracelet, a favorite poem, a funny DVD, an encouraging note or even a joke book. Have everyone return the item during the next meeting and occasionally have people bring fresh items.
3. Let your small group write a silly theme as their next icebreaker. If anyone plays the guitar, have them help. You can pick a well known song. Write your own lyrics. Have fun with it and open or close each meeting with it. Comedian Anita Renfroe has a fun parenting song to get you brainstorming.
4. Bring some corny things to use during your meetings. Avoid making anyone feel pressured to use them. (If you force someone to wear a clown nose she may never come back) Have them available, however, and encourage goofiness before getting down to the real reasons you are there. Oriental Trading supply is the source of thousands of funny items guaranteed to spur a giggle.
5. Though it can be a challenge, don't let your group tune into a platform for any member to talk continuously about his or her disease, the treatments, alternative treatments and even complaints. If someone tends to dominate the conversation, let your group know you are implementing the use of a timer to make sure everyone has equal opportunity to share. Set whatever guidelines you wish, for instance, you could allow people to vent for sixty seconds on any topic. Or they could share about an alternative treatment they've found useful, but when the timer rings, time is up!
6. Have everyone bring something to put into a basket of encouragement for someone else. It may be someone who is having surgery from your group or a friend of someone in the group who has just been diagnosed. Brainstorm together about what items people would like, and be sure to remember sometimes the personal notes mean the most. If it's appropriate consider including family members.
7. Go out for one evening just for fun. If everyone want to act their age you may consider a sit down restaurant, or you can head on over to Chuck E. Cheese's or Build-A-Bear. It's a terrific icebreaker for small groups since people who haven't opened up in the group may find this is a more relaxed environment. Consider including family members to participate.
8. Have items on hand that will encourage people to thrive despite their illness. For example, National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness week has fun things like bumper stickers, pins, mugs and stickers that have themes like "My illness is invisible but my hope shines through."
9. Invite guest speakers who you trust will speak positively. Inform your speakers that they can "tell it like it is" but that you always want people to leave the meeting feeling energized; not depressed. Let them know they can use props, tell a joke, or do whatever it takes to keep people paying attention.
10. The people in your group are quite amazing and able to make a difference. This is important for them to remember since they often feel so out of control. Your group may not be able to actually walk for charity, but they can likely work at a registration table, pass out bottles of water for a walk/run, or even just hand out presents to kids at the children's hospital. Teens with chronic illness often get support groups can be great motivators for these kinds of outings. Find a project people are passionate about where they can see they are making a difference in the lives of others.
Support groups can provide some of the most influential relationships that can help one live successfully with chronic illness. The environment of the group, however, can make or break its usefulness. With these few simple tips, your group can be a refuge and a place of true relaxation, creating an special group for people to create friendships that could just last as long as the illness, perhaps indefinitely.
About the Author
Instant download of more ideas for icebreakers for small groups with your free gift of 200 Ways to Encourage a Chronically Ill Friend from "Beyond Casseroles" by Lisa Copen. Just sign up for a weekly encouragement ezine, HopeNotes.
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